Shades of Purple and Black Wowed at This Parisian-Inspired Wedding at Conrad Washington, D.C.

Melva and Emmanuel tied the knot in an April wedding at the Conrad Hotel in Washington, D.C., with a color palette of purple, black and green. However, the story of how they got to that day begins long before. "Early in my life, I was that girl with the infamous life plan notebook," shares Melva. "In this notebook, my entire life was perfectly detailed. Graduate with honors by 21, marry my Morris Chestnut or Leon look-alike by 30, and have my first of three children by 35. When I reached 21, I considered myself well on my way because I graduated with honors from Howard University and was headed to an Ivy league graduate education. But, then, 30 hit and I was single; at 35, I was in a relationship that, looking back, I knew wasn’t right but in my desperation, I held on to it. In my late 30s, I came to terms with the fact that three children would not be possible in traditional ways due to my infertility; and, then, finally, at 40, I threw out my notebook, thought time to shift my mindset on the perfect life, and began living the life that was unfolding before my eyes. What can I say? I am stubborn, and it took me a long time to actively participate in living my life. Years later I would meet the love of my life (at a bar!) and get engaged. I can say with full confidence that my engagement was worth the wait. Now I see that for every wedding I went to where I had no date and spent far too much time at the open bar, was a member of a wedding party or the perfect attendee at baby showers, prepared me for this moment (even despite the pandemic). Hear this: You deserve to fully be a bride no matter your age."

At every step of the way, even the engagement and engagement announcement process, Melva and Emmanuel decided to do things their way and focus on what was most important to the two of them as a couple. "To the world, I formally announced my engagement after being engaged for two months. As a couple, we decided to delay our announcement for personal and global reasons," explains Melva. "The reality is that if I had gotten married when I was younger, my partner would have asked for my dad’s hand in marriage. Yet, at this stage, my partner’s parents are deceased, my father has dementia, and even though neither of us has previously been married, our views on asking for my hand in marriage shifted as we matured. Instead, we discussed for a few months what being married meant to us and agreed that it was important for my parents to hear privately about the engagement before the entire world was informed. Due to COVID and my parents’ health struggles, this took more time than we anticipated. But, to see a twinkle in my dad’s eye—I believe he has some understanding of what is going on—and my mother’s smile was worth the social media delay. Including my parents was the initial driver behind wanting to delay our engagement announcement but then we took on a more global perspective; the U.S. Capitol sits near enough to our home that we witnessed firsthand the insurrection and wondered, 'Can we safely announce our engagement as a multi/bi-cultural couple?' and 'Are we setting ourselves up to be victims of online bullying or threats?' Simply put, we were afraid and became increasingly aware that, sadly, we live in a society that will always judge us, have an opinion of who we should marry, and what color they should be. In many ways, my partner and I saw hope in Madame Vice President and the Second Gentleman as they demonstrate unconditional love and unwavering support for each other despite what the national climate suggests. We decided that it was not our responsibility to live the rest of our lives small. At this season in our life, we want to scream to the world, love wins, regardless of race, age, culture, gender, or class." And so, the couple chose not to delay their marriage and opted to exchange vows in an intimate celebration amid the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. 

When it came to designing their actual wedding day, the couple continued with the precedent they'd set of focusing on what's important to them and going from there. "Our intimate affair was intentionally designed to reflect our multi-cultural union since Emmanuel is French and white and I am Black and American," says Melva. "Additionally, it was important for us to include music since Emmanuel is a former Billboard Magazine Global Editor and music brought us together two-and-a-half years ago while he was waiting to attend an Afrobeat drum concert at a bar in my neighborhood. Our palette was centered around black and white hues and we knew that our core flower has to be the anemone with other touches to reflect what we call 'understated elegance.'"

To kick off their wedding celebration, "guests were greeted with a personalized multi-lingual welcome note," says Melva. "For us, these small, significant and thoughtful touches were perfect." Another personalized touch that Melva included in the wedding ceremony was a picture of her father, who couldn't be present at the wedding, wrapped around her bouquet. "Before I walked out, I looked down at my bouquet and said, "Dad, are you ready?" I immediately cried after. That bouquet sits in my living room as a nod to his presence," she says. The meaningful personalization continued throughout the wedding reception as well. The couple had multi-lingual acrylic menus made so guests could easily read a summary of the foods on offer. The wine pairings that went with the food were also deeply personal. "To include Emmanuel's parents who are no longer living, every wine pairing represented his father's career as a diplomat, where his mother lived her last years and where his siblings now live. As such, during our dinner service, the sommelier presented each wine and Emmanuel followed up with his family connection," recalls Melva. To cap off the evening, the couple served a Parisian-inspired wedding cake that looked like the Eiffel Tower and macarons before enjoying a traditional French cheese course. 

Looking back on her wedding day, Melva has three pieces of advice she believes all current-to-weds should keep in mind. "1. Be present because it goes by so quickly. 2. Financial plan and hire vendors you trust. It is an investment but it was worth every single penny to enter the day worry-free. 3. Prioritize each other above everything else, literally everything else."