One Couple’s Khmer and American Wedding Day Infused With Bold Color in Rochester, Minnesota
“I bought the ring a couple of months before proposing, but I knew for quite some time that I wanted to ask her, just didn’t know when,” describes Davan Ngiem. Popping the question to his long-distance-turned-live-in girlfriend, Sadie, was a nerve-wracking experience for the groom. However, the bride was blissfully unaware. “I had no idea the proposal was happening,” says Sadie. “We went to the Minnesota Zoo, and he surprised me! I was checking out my favorite animals—the fruit bats—and when I turned around, he was on one knee, asking me to marry him. Easiest yes, of course.”
As Davan’s cultural background is Khmer—Cambodian—it was important to both the bride and groom that they infuse Khmer wedding traditions into their big day. “We both aren’t big fans of large, traditional weddings (by both American and Khmer standards), so the ability to customize the wedding to our preferences was key!” Sadie shares. As Cambodian weddings can be week-long celebrations, the couple elected to pare down the customs to fit inside a single day, ending in a Western ceremony.
The day began with a meaningful, spiritual component. “First was the Monks Blessing: two Monks from the local temple came and blessed us and our families with happiness, health, prosperity and general goodness,” Sadie tells. For fashion, the pair was able to borrow some traditional attire from the same temple. “We chose the color palette based on our favorite colors, mine being purple and Davan’s being green. All the jewelry and adornments came with it, so we didn’t have to spend much time choosing anything but colors! It was a relief, in all honesty.” The couple donned white-and-green attire for the first occasion of the day, changing into purple outfits for the following customs.
After the ceremony, Davan participated in the groom’s processional, which led into the passing of the blessings. “This was an involved ceremony where our guests pass three candles counterclockwise around us while special prayers are being said,” the bride describes. “Each guest passes their right hand over the flame, which sweeps any blessings from them to us.” To finish the Khmer traditions of the day, the couple hosted a knot-tying ceremony, wherein family members from both sides dip two red strings into a vat of Holy Water and tie one of the strings around the bride or groom’s wrist. Then, religious experts recite blessings and dip a flower into the Holy Water to sprinkle some over the couple. “I do admit there was a lot more bonking than sprinkling going on, but we loved every second of being able to talk with our families,” Sadie recalls.
At the termination of the final Khmer ceremony, Sadie and Davan are considered culturally married—so, on to the American celebration! The newlyweds changed one last time into their Western wedding wear. “I didn’t really know what I wanted, but my American dress ended up being a bridesmaid dress that hit everything I didn’t know I was looking for,” the bride says. “I adore the off-the-shoulder sleeves and the sweetheart neckline; I felt like a princess while wearing it. Davan rocked the white button-up and black slacks and looked amazing, as usual!”
They said their quick “I dos” culminated in a round of shots. The new Mr. and Mrs. led friends and family to a classic American backyard party to cap off a perfect day. “We wanted all our decor to be re-usable, eco-friendly and recyclable,” Sadie emphasizes. “Our backdrop was made from hand-cut PVC pipe. My mom and maid of honor were kind enough to style it with the drapery and faux flowers we had. Family from both sides let us borrow their canopies, tables and chairs, and some backyard games. We kept it a little more relaxed and lightly styled our dinner tables with black tablecloths and gold runners to match the gold of our Khmer outfits. The centerpieces were geometric black vases with assorted fall-colored florals. It was simple but beautiful.”